Thursday, June 30, 2016

jonah...

jonah may have been swallowed by a whale...but at least he remembered his pocket pussy .

earth...



earth :
i am not stupid enough
to buy into all this bullshit
apparently
i am not smart enough
to change it
so why in the fuck
did god put me down here
in the first place ???

pizza and beer , maybe

Monday, June 27, 2016

dream analysis...



there i am studying dream analysis
with a friend of mine
he tells me about this one dream
where he has a penis in his mouth
and his head is rocking back and forth
i tell him that it means
LIFE IS HARD
fuck , what else could i say
his wife was there

Sunday, June 26, 2016

...life is hard...

there i am studying dream analysis
with a friend of mine
he tells me about this one dream
where he has a penis in his mouth
and his head is rocking back and forth
i tell him that it means
LIFE IS HARD
fuck , what else could i say
his wife was there

Thursday, June 23, 2016

fucka yourself...

they named him "fucka"
his last name was "yourself"
the tribe never understood
the significance
thank god
anyway
his daughter grew up to be
a world famous slut

...so that was nice

Sunday, June 19, 2016

...you would think...

you would think when people believe things
and they don't work out
they would start to believe
other things instead
however
what they do
is believe the same things harder

surely , this is a bad idea

Saturday, June 18, 2016

...when people believe things...

you would think when people believe things
and they don't work out
they would start to believe
other things instead
however
what they do
is believe the same things harder

surely , this is a bad idea

Monday, June 13, 2016

your dog...

your dog will always understand you
never judge
sure as fuck never gossip
and certainly not use the newly acquired information 
as a source of power  
roughly translated
your dog loves you
and i am not saying your mother doesn't
but look at the fucking baggage
she comes with

dog 7 people no score
at the end of the first period  

Saturday, June 11, 2016

crotch rut...

billy cock
and johnny balls
together
looking for a name
for their duet
send in your suggestion
there is no financial reward
but
on your death bead
you will not have crotch rut
hopefully 

Friday, June 10, 2016

...chocolate chip cookies...

if i tell you your chocolate chip cookies
are not as good as they used to be
you will tell me to " suck my dick"
if i say they are delicious
you will indeed suck my dick

i wonder what the verdict is ???

Wednesday, June 8, 2016

cavemen...

did you know cavemen
used to kill dinosaurs
just so they could
take their nut-sack
and store baseball cards in it ???
sometimes
they would give one
to cave girls
just so they could store their electric razors
and all the attachments  

Saturday, June 4, 2016

bad day for the yeti man...

once they discover bigfoot
then nobody will give a flying fuck about him
you know , after the initial excitement
and shit  
point being
if i were bigfoot 
sure as fuck
i would be learning
to make party balloons
or something like that anyway
better still
build a flying saucer
and get the fuck out of dodge

bad days ahead for the yeti man