MARS...THE BRAVE NEW WORLD...

I THINK WE SHOULD POPULATE MARS...JUST IN CASE THE SUN BURNS OUT .

THE ASSHOLE OF THE UNIVERSE...

WE ONCE BELIEVED WE WERE THE CENTER OF THE UNIVERSE...CLOSE BUT NO COOKIE...WE ARE THE ASSHOLE OF THE UNIVERSE .

FUCK YOU UP...

WHAT CAN FUCK YOU UP...CAN ALSO FUCK YOU DOWN .

WANTED...HOME FOR STRAY PENIS...

PENIS LOOKING FOR HOME...ONLY VAGINA'S AND MALE BRITISH TELEVISION STARS MAY APPLY .

THE GOSPEL OF JESUS' BROTHER , ROBBIE

I 'LL TELL YOU WHY I WON'T FEED THE POOR...THEY ARE FUCKING POOR , THAT'S WHY...I'M GONNA FEED THE RICH INSTEAD .

THE GOSPEL OF JESUS' BROTHER , ROBBIE

FUCK THE SICK...LET'S GO GET STONED .

COFFEE MACHINE...

MY COFFEE MACHINE BROKE DOWN...SO I POURED SOME WATER UP MY ASS...AND PLUGGED MY NOSE INTO THE ELECTRICAL OUTLET .

AN ODE TO THE FOURTH DATE...

I'M JUST CURIOS...YOU SAID YOU WANT TO HAVE SEX..."OR SOMETHING"...NOW...WHAT IS THIS..."OR SOMETHING"...AND SHOULD I BE AFRAID ???  

THE OLYMPICS...

IF THEY MAKE RUBBING YOUR BALLS AN OLYMPIC EVENT...WILL IT HELP YOUR SELF ESTEEM ???

GOD HIDES...

GOD HIDES CUTE THINGS BEHIND BABIES .

RELOAD...

have you ever noticed how the word...RELOAD...looks like a paranoid person ???

HORRIBLE HUMAN BEING...

I MAY BE A HORRIBLE HUMAN BEING...BUT WHO HAS THE EXTRA LARGE BAG OF GLUTEN FREE POTATO CHIPS ???

THE THING...

THE THING IN THEIR MOUTH ISN'T THE THING...THE THING IS THE THING .

IDIOT...

ONLY AN IDIOT WOULD CALL AN IDIOT AN IDIOT .

RELIGION AND SOUP...

PEOPLE LIKE THEIR RELIGION LIKE THEY LIKE THEIR SOUP .

THE EGG AND THE OLD LADY...

HAVE YOU EVER THROWN AN EGG AT AN OLD LADY ??? AND WATCH IT DRIP LIKE SUMMERTIME ???

LOSING IT...

IT IS EASIER TO LOSE IT THAN FIND IT...AND IT IS EASIER STILL NOT TO LOOK FOR IT .

MUGS AND STUFF...

WHY DO I BUY MUGS THAT ARE TOO FUCKING HIGH TO CLEAN PROPERLY ???

SEA MONSTERS...

SEA MONSTERS CAN'T LICK THEIR BALLS...SO THEY ATTACK SHIPS INSTEAD .

CAIN TOAD , MAMMA...

I ONCE MARRIED THIS COUPLE ON TOP OF A ROOF...SHE WAS WEARING ARMY BOOTS AND HAD A THING FOR CAIN TOADS...I DON'T REMEMBER SWEET FUCK ALL ABOUT HIM .

THIS IS THE BEST WAY TO EARN A SIX PACK SINCE THAT SHIT EATING CONTEST .

HOW TO SUCK A DICK...

HOW TO SUCK A DICK...FIRST...FIND SOMEONE NAMED DICK .

HERE ON EARTH...

HOT DOGS WITH JESUS...ARE BETTER THAN STEAK HERE ON EARTH .

PIPPIN...

I CALLED FOR MY DOG PIPPEN..." PIPPIN , PIPPIN...WHERE ARE YOU PIPPIN ??? " BUT PIPPIN DID NOT ANSWER...MAYBE PIPPIN WAS MORE OF A STATE OF MIND THAN A REAL DOG  .

THE PENIS OF DELUSION...

THE PENIS OF DELUSION IS SUCKED BY THE DONKEY OF DISSATISFACTION...IN THE VALLEY OF REGRET...BY THE SEA OF HEARTBREAK...AT 2 P.M.EASTERN .

THE BATH...

I DREAMED I SAW MY TEACHER ON THE STREET...I ASKED HER IF SHE WANTED TO TAKE A BATH TOGETHER SOME TIME .

BE FUCKING CAREFUL...

IF YOU HOLED ON...YOU WILL LOSE IT...IF YOU LOSE IT...YOU WILL ALSO LOSE IT...AND IF YOU LET IT GO...YUP !!! YOU LOSE IT .

SO BE FUCKING CAREFUL .

OLD MCDONALD...

'' OLD MCDONALD HAD A..."...WHAT DID OLD MCDONALD HAVE ??? I'LL GIVE YOU A HINT...IT WASN'T A FARM . 

RICK AND DICK...

WHAT IS THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN PLAYING WITH YOUR DICK...AND PRAYING FOR RICK ???