THE MEEK...

THE MEEK WILL INHERIT THE EARTH...EITHER THAT...OR COCKROACHES .

THE HOUSE

HE BUILT HIS LOVER A BEAUTIFUL HOUSE...THEN HE LOCKED HER IN THE BASEMENT .

THE SHELL AND THE BUG

FUCK , I HATE CARRYING MY SHELL , said one bug to the other bugs...so they helped him take it off...then they ate him .

THE TIGER

ONE MOTHER GAVE HER SON A POUND OF HAMBURGER FOR HIS BIRTHDAY...THE OTHER GAVE HER SON...A BEAUTIFUL TIGER...WHO ATE HIM .

THE TEDDY BEAR

ONCE THERE WAS A LITTLE BOY...WHO HELD ON TO HIS TEDDY BEAR SO TIGHTLY...SHIT CAME OUT OF ITS EARS .

PARALLEL UNIVERSE...

IN A PARALLEL UNIVERSE...THE CATHOLIC CHURCH...FLOGGED PEOPLE FOR NOT MASTURBATING ENOUGH .

SUING GOD

I DREAMED THAT WE DISCOVERED THAT THE ENTIRE UNIVERSE WAS SITTING UPON A LADIES NIPPLE...SO THE RELIGIOUS SUED GOD OVER SOME TYPE OF PORNO THING .

ELECTRIC EEL

I DREAMED THERE WAS AN ELECTRIC EEL IN MY CRAPPER....HE TOLD ME THAT HE WOULDN'T STING ME...IF I LIT HIS JOINT FOR HIM .

HOUSE WARMING...

I WAS INVITED TO A HOUSE WARMING PARTY...SO I BURNED THE PLACE TO THE GROUND .

DON'T DO IT...

IF YOU DON'T DO IT...THEN YOU DON'T HAVE TO WORRY WHERE IT GOES .

VIBRATORS...

I HAVE MADE MY FORTUNE...SELLING NAMES FOR VIBRATORS .

TRY NEW THINGS...

TRY NEW THINGS...YOU KNOW...LIKE ROBBING A BANK .

SHIT FIGHT

WHY DID JESUS NEVER GET IN A SHIT FIGHT ??? HE DIDN'T WANT TO GET SHIT ALL OVER HIM...( WHY IS THIS SO COMPLICATED ) .

the joy of sex...

i bought the book...THE JOY OF SEX...and i screwed the shit right out of it .

THE IDIOT

THE IDIOT DIDN'T WANT TO BE AN IDIOT ANY MORE...SO HE SURROUNDED HIMSELF WITH BIGGER IDIOTS .

FAVORITE MOVIE

FAVORITE MOVIE : night of the day of the dawn of the vampires in the middle of the afternoon .

NEW RELIGION...

I HAVE DECIDED TO START A NEW RELIGION...YOUR NAME CAN BE PACA-LAMA .

TITS

DID YOU EVER THINK GOD MADE TITS JUST FOR YOU ???

COMING THIS FALL...

COMING THIS FALL...ALIEN ERECTION !!!

BREAST MILK

IF THE WORLD KEEPS ON GOING LIKE IT IS...IN 10 YEARS...BREAST MILK WILL BE 50 % SUGAR .

THE GOOD SAMARITAN

ONCE IT WAS DISCOVERED THAT the good samaritan...WAS GAY...MOST JUST SIMPLY REFERRED TO HIM AS THE SAMARITAN .

THE LOVIN MAN...

ONCE A MAN WANTED TO BE THE MOST LOVING PERSON IN THE WORLD...SO HE KILLED EVERYONE .

PICTURES...

SOMETIMES UGLY PICTURES...ARE PAINTED WITH BEAUTIFUL BRUSHES .

...AND THIS IS FUNNY BECAUSE ???

THE SAME SNOW THAT HIDES THE EVIDENCE...PRESERVES IT AS WELL .

RELIGION...

THE BEST THING ABOUT RELIGION...IS GETTING TO BEAT YOURSELF . 

WITH A FUCK-A-DOODLE-DO...

WITH A FUCK-A-DOODLE-DO...EVERYTHING CAN BE CHANGED .

ORAL SEX

THE MINISTER TOLD THE CONGREGATION NOT TO HAVE ORAL SEX...THEN HE DEMONSTRATED WHAT IT WAS THEY SHOULD NOT DO .