they tell us that cavemen
never lived at the same time
as dinosaurs
but you notice
there is not a fucking
dinosaur around
that will testify to this
i'm just saying
Tuesday, May 31, 2016
Monday, May 30, 2016
THE CAVEMAN...
they tell us that cavemen
never lived at the same time
as dinosaurs
but you notice
there is not a fucking
dinosaur around
that will testify to this
i'm just saying
never lived at the same time
as dinosaurs
but you notice
there is not a fucking
dinosaur around
that will testify to this
i'm just saying
Friday, May 27, 2016
the advent of POCKET PUSSY...
...would do me a favour and put this piece of plastic around your cock ???
Thursday, May 26, 2016
...the new church...
you told me you decided to join
this new church down the road
and it was , you know , fine
but three weeks later
you decided to become an atheist
interesting
but better yet
apparently you can get a hard-on again
hummmmm , all i can say to that is
praise the lord :
"you will know my people
by the fruits they bare''
this new church down the road
and it was , you know , fine
but three weeks later
you decided to become an atheist
interesting
but better yet
apparently you can get a hard-on again
hummmmm , all i can say to that is
praise the lord :
"you will know my people
by the fruits they bare''
Tuesday, May 24, 2016
I SPEND MY LIFE...
i spend my life
in service and commitment
to other people
and that is why
when it comes to sex
i want it done my way
for me
and nobody but me
understand ???
in service and commitment
to other people
and that is why
when it comes to sex
i want it done my way
for me
and nobody but me
understand ???
POCKET PUSSY...
i asked your wife where i could get a good pocket pussy...and she kicked me in the pocket pussy .
Monday, May 23, 2016
Sunday, May 22, 2016
...make your contribution today....
ass holes make decisions...fingers write them down...the rest of the body pretends to be doing something to contribute .
Friday, May 20, 2016
Thursday, May 19, 2016
...one caveman...
one cave man
says to the other :
"i'll tell you why i haven't invented fire
i've been too busy
getting my dick sucked...
what's your excuse ???"
says to the other :
"i'll tell you why i haven't invented fire
i've been too busy
getting my dick sucked...
what's your excuse ???"
Tuesday, May 17, 2016
TENNIS...
i used to teach tennis
i would say things like
"that's one fuckin' rotten back hand
you got there , dumb ass "
and get paid reasonably good money
then i would screw their girlfriends
and overcompensate by
tearing their reputation apart
and have them fired from work
amen
i would say things like
"that's one fuckin' rotten back hand
you got there , dumb ass "
and get paid reasonably good money
then i would screw their girlfriends
and overcompensate by
tearing their reputation apart
and have them fired from work
amen
Monday, May 16, 2016
HOMOSEXUALITY IN IRAN
so this fucker in iran
declares that there is 100 % heterosexuality
in his country
you know , he conveniently leaves out
that if , in fact ,
someone is gay
they will chop his fucking head off
or worse
but besides that
he does has a point
not much of a point
but a point
declares that there is 100 % heterosexuality
in his country
you know , he conveniently leaves out
that if , in fact ,
someone is gay
they will chop his fucking head off
or worse
but besides that
he does has a point
not much of a point
but a point
MR . FOOT
people say bigfoot does not exist
maybe it does
maybe it does not
thing is
if you get these skeptics drunk enough
you will be soon realize
they aren't talking about bigfoot at all
nope !!!!!
what they are really saying is :
" i am so fucking smart
that there ain't a fucking monkey alive
that can out whit me
now let me go back to my pea soup
and drown in it until i have convinced myself
that i am straight "
maybe it does
maybe it does not
thing is
if you get these skeptics drunk enough
you will be soon realize
they aren't talking about bigfoot at all
nope !!!!!
what they are really saying is :
" i am so fucking smart
that there ain't a fucking monkey alive
that can out whit me
now let me go back to my pea soup
and drown in it until i have convinced myself
that i am straight "
Thursday, May 12, 2016
THE GROCERY STORE LINE...
this fellow behind me in the grocery store
leaves our lane in favor of another one
i yell : "you fucking traitor !!!"
he just slides away
you know , like most of his type
i slowly pull out my hand gun
as i begin to foam at the mouth
leaves our lane in favor of another one
i yell : "you fucking traitor !!!"
he just slides away
you know , like most of his type
i slowly pull out my hand gun
as i begin to foam at the mouth
Wednesday, May 11, 2016
JOHNNY CASH...
the day that johnny cash died
all the johnny cash vocals on my
johnny cash albums
were completely erased
fucking gone
no more
but the really strange thing is
my life only gets weirder
from here
all the johnny cash vocals on my
johnny cash albums
were completely erased
fucking gone
no more
but the really strange thing is
my life only gets weirder
from here
Monday, May 9, 2016
Sunday, May 8, 2016
NOW THAT YOUR LIFE...
now that your life is almost over
dying on the good old death bed
and all that shit
tell me
how does it feel to have done
all that stuff
you know the shit
the crap you can only get away with
if there are banana trees
growing all around you
and you are sweating your fucking ass off
just curious
non of my business
tell god i said "hi"
dying on the good old death bed
and all that shit
tell me
how does it feel to have done
all that stuff
you know the shit
the crap you can only get away with
if there are banana trees
growing all around you
and you are sweating your fucking ass off
just curious
non of my business
tell god i said "hi"
Thursday, May 5, 2016
SHIT HEAD TWO...
the tennis team was called the SHIT HEAD TWO...which...in retrospect...did not help a lot .
Tuesday, May 3, 2016
2000 YEARS...
two thousand years since jesus christ
and what have we accomplished ???
the curtains in fundamentalist churches
are far nicer now
and are easier to dust as well
and , oh yes ,
church people are allowed to be mean
when they play hockey
that is about it
and what have we accomplished ???
the curtains in fundamentalist churches
are far nicer now
and are easier to dust as well
and , oh yes ,
church people are allowed to be mean
when they play hockey
that is about it
Sunday, May 1, 2016
THE SCIENTIST...
the scientist does not believe
in the existence of bigfoot
but for very scientific reasons
the foremost being
and i quote :
"it's a bunch of fucking bullshit"
hummmmmmmm
above my head , baby
in the existence of bigfoot
but for very scientific reasons
the foremost being
and i quote :
"it's a bunch of fucking bullshit"
hummmmmmmm
above my head , baby
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