SPECIAL BATTER...

SOMEWHERE OUT THERE...THERE IS A SPECIAL BATTER FOR EVERY FISH .

JURASSIC PARK...

IT WOULD BE DIFFICULT HAVING SEX IN " JURASSIC PARK "...YOU KNOW...HARD TO CONCENTRATE AND ALL THAT SHIT .

THE DEVIL WENT DOWN TO GEORGIA...

THE DEVIL WENT DOWN TO GEORGIA...AND FARMED PEANUTS .

ASS-OLOGY

THERE IS NOTHING MORE BEAUTIFUL THAN AN ASS THAT ALLOWS YOU TO SMUGGLE A 24 OF BEER INSIDE IT .

TRUTH IS A LEOPARD IN THE FOREST...COMPLETELY HUNGOVER .

HAVE A GREAT DAY !!!

ALPACA INC .

IF YOU EVER BEGIN AN ALPACA  FARM...MAKE SURE YOU POST A SIGN..."NO SUCKING OFF THE ALPACA "

KILL...

I NEVER THREATENED TO KILL ANYONE...AND IF I FIND OUT WHO SAID THAT...I WILL KILL THEM .

B. HORNJUICE

MOSES PARTING THE RED SEA...

I WOULD LIKE TO WRITE A MUSICAL CONCERNING MOSES PARTING THE RED SEA...BUT THROUGH THE EYES OF HIS CAT .

PUPPY LOVE...

PUPPY LOVE IS FINE AND DANDY...JUST MAKE SURE THE PUPPY DOES NOT GROW UP AND EAT YOU .

SCREWING IN YOUR 60'S...

SCREWING IN YOUR 60 'S...IS A GOOD WAY OF TEACHING PEOPLE THE VALUE OF EFFERT .

BUNNY UP MY ASS...

THERE WAS A BUNNY UP MY ASS...AND THE DR . TOLD ME TO TAKE TWO CARROTS AND CALL HIM IN THE MORNING .

BUNNY EARS...

LET'S PUT ON OUR BUNNY EARS...AND HOP THROUGH THE FOREST OF MANGLED PERCEPTIONS .

SEXUAL LUBRICANT...

DID YOU EVER HAVE ONE OF THOSE DAY WHEN YOU PUT YOUR SEXUAL LUBRICANT ON YOUR TOOTH BRUSH...THEN YOU BRUSH SO FAST THE YOU HURT YOUR GUMS ???

GET A GRIP...

GET A GRIP ON YOUR PENIS...NOT YOUR WIFE'S MOTHERS NECK .

THE MINISTER...

THE MINISTER YELLED FROM THE PULPIT..." BREASTS ARE FOR BABIES , NOT FOR SEXUAL PLEASURE !!! "...AND THEN SOME GUY SCREAMED BACK..." NEXT YOU WILL BE TELLING US NOT TO SUCK DICKS " .

AN ODE TO A BULL TERRIER

FOUR COYOTES STALK A BULL TERRIER...ONE GETS TOO CLOSE AND HAS HIS HEAD CHEWED OFF...THE OTHERS HUDDLE FOR A MOMENT...TURN AROUND AND WALK AWAY .

YETI SHIT...

YOU COULD TELL IT WAS YETI SHIT...BECAUSE THE WORDS..." YETI SHIT "...WERE WRITTEN ON IT .

THE LAKE OF FIRE...

THE LAKE OF FIRE...CONTAINS NO BUBBLE BATH .

JEALOUS BOYFRIEND...

ROSE WOULD MASTURBATE WITH A WINE BOTTLE...HER BOYFRIEND GOT JEALOUS AND BROKE IT .

YETI SHIT...

IN A TWIST OF IRONY...YETI SHIT TASTES LIKE CHICKEN .

THE YETI STRIKES AGAIN...

THE ONLY GREATER HONOR THAN BEING EATEN BY A YETI...IS NOT BEING EATEN BY ONE .

FIRST HOMO EXPERIENCE...

SO BILLY HAD HIS FIRST HOMOSEXUAL EXPERIENCE...HIS EVALUATION..."NEEDS MORE VINEGAR" .