THE WHORE HOUSE...

THE WHORE HOUSE IS JUST DOING WHAT IT SUPPOSED TO BE DOING .

VAMPIRE BAT

A VAMPIRE BAT MAY SUCK YOUR BLOOD...BUT GUESS WHAT A FRUIT BAT SUCKS ???

STUPID FUCKING MARRIAGE...

I WILL NOT JUDGE YOUR STUPID FUCKING MARRIAGE .

THE MANSON FAMILY

new situation comedy...THE MANSON FAMILY...coming this fall .

TOILET PAPER...

TOILET PAPER...APPLY DIRECTLY TO ASS .

OUR GREATEST PRESIDENT...EMBELLISHED

IF YOU WANT TO TEST A MANS CHARACTER GIVE HIM POWER*...IF YOU WANT TO TEST HIS ABILITY TO SMILE...GIVE HIM A BLOW JOB .

*ABRAHAM L.

ME AND MY BALL...

ME AND MY BALL ARE GOING HOME...AND I AIN'T GOT NO FUCKING BALL .

BILL'S TOILET PAPER...

BILL'S TOILET PAPER...JUST ASK YOUR ASS HOLE WHO MAKES THE BEST TOILET PAPER .

SHUT THE FUCK UP...

IT'S NICE SEEING KIDS YOUR AGE HAVING A GOOD TIME...NOW SHUT THE FUCK UP .

HERO...

IF A HERO DOESN'T HAVE A VILLAIN...THEN HE WILL PROBABLY JUST GO BACK TO HIS DRUGS OR HIS PORN .

pregnancy

increase your chances of pregnancy...stick it in the right hole .

CLERGYMAN DOING WEIRD SHIT...

IF YOU ARE SURPRISED THAT YOUR CLERGYMAN GOT CAUGHT DOING SOME REALLY WEIRD SHIT...THEN YOU NEED YOUR HEAD EXAMINED .

STUPID FUCKING VALUES...

I WOULD NEVER QUESTION YOUR STUPID , FUCKING VALUES .

RELIGION...

RELIGION IS LIKE LYNARD SKYNARD...AFTER THE PLANE CRASH .

GODZILLA PORN...

WHAT THE WORLD NEEDS IS A GOOD GODZILLA PORNO MOVIE .

hitler's dick...

my theory is that if hitler's dick had been two inches longer...there would have been no war .

your shit...

your shit has no handles...so let it go .

ICE CREAM...

THERE ARE TWO TYPES OF ICE CREAM...HARD AS A DICK AND SOFT LIKE A PENIS .

PET SQUIRREL...

...BUT I DID TAKE CARE OF YOUR PET SQUIRREL WHILE YOU WERE AWAY...I PRAYED EVERYDAY THAT SOMEONE WOULD FEED IT .

JUDGEMENT...

GOD HAS GIVEN US EACH OTHER...TO JUDGE .

finding myself...

i went on a big foot expedition...and i found myself .

DON'T BLAME THE CIGARETTE...

DON'T BLAME THE CIGARETTE...IT WAS THE CANCER THAT KILLED HIM .

SAM THE SPERM

SAM THE SPERM SPENT HIS ENTIRE LIFE BEING TERRIFIED OF BEING SHOT ONTO THE CEILING .

ENDANGERED SPECIES...

THE ENDANGERED SPECIES I SUPPORT...IS THE PIGEON...BECAUSE WHO WANTS TO SUPPORT A LOSER .

HUMAN BEHAVIOR

THE MOST UNNATURAL PART ABOUT HUMAN BEHAVIOR...IS HOW PEOPLE REACT TO IT .

PICK-UP LINE...

FAVORITE PIC-UP LINE..." WHAT IS THAT BIG FAT ASS OF YOURS DOING TONIGHT ??? "

BULL RING

IF YOU PUT A BULL RING IN YOUR PENIS...MAKE SURE THE BULL IS NOT ATTACHED .

LITTLE RED RIDING-HOOD

THE TRUTH IS LITTLE RED-RIDING-HOOD WAS INTO SCREWING WOLVES...THE REST OF THE STORY IS JUST A COVER-UP .

GRANDMA AND DYLAN

MY GRANDMOTHER NEVER LIKED BOB DYLAN...BUT I AM SURE HE GOT OVER IT .

WONDERFUL EYES

ME SAYS TO DA YOUNG LADY...ME SAYS..." YA GOT WONDERFUL EYES...WHERE DID YA GET 'EM ??? "

I NEVER MET A SHRINK...

I NEVER MET A SHRINK...THAT DIDN'T NEED ONE .

SPACE TURD...

I REMEMBER THE TIME I HAD A SHIT IN OUTER SPACE...AND THE GOVERNMENT GAVE ME A MEDAL .