the rat in church...

last night i saw a rat run into a church...i hope they don't fuck him up too badly .

...what about the bats ???

do bats block the doorway at your church ???

measure your ejaculation...

measure your ejaculation by your smile and not the distance .

...bad days ahead for the yeti man...

if i were bigfoot...i would build a flying saucer and get the fuck out of here...you know , for obvious reasons .

IRONY...and a bear...

the irony is...from a certain perspective...if you fuck a bear...you will be a hero .

the simpsons

so the politician got in front of everyone
and gave this fucking speech
about a better tomorrow
and all this shit
...then came the question and answer
portion of the program
...this fellow says
and i quote :
"seriously
what would you rather be doing
speaking to us
or sitting at home
watching " the simpson's" ???
he scratched his ass
got out of his chair 
and walked out the door

...a bunch of kids...

this bunch of kids
were wearing pink shirts that read
" don't bully , be nice "
or something like that
anyway
it was all very sweet
until they took out their brass knuckles
their clubs
and other such stuff
and began to beat the shit
out of this little el-bino  fellow
probably gay and with a lisp
i would have helped
but my viagra was kicking in