faliure...

failure teaches you how to fail .

hockey commentator

why would i like to be a hockey commentator ??? just so i can say..."he shoots...he hits the fucking goal post ." 

cuba

cuba is one of the few places in the world where you can show up at the local bar with a glass of rum in your hands...and nobody will think it to be weird .

shitting on people

it is easy to shit on people...unless they are hanging from the ceiling .

floating on a fart

it is hard to stand your ground...when you are floating on a fart .

signing autographs for elton john

one goose says to the other..."what do you do for a living???" he replies..."i am a plumber and i also sign autographs for elton john." 

smile...

SMILE !!! if someone has a gun to your head...and will shoot you if you don't .